Memoirs of a Bride, Chapter 2: Giddy Bride-to-Be

It's safe to assume that any time I am writing a blog, Uriah is sleeping. This time is no different. Snooze on, little man! I got a legacy to document! All right, maybe it's not THAT serious, but I'm sure some posterity, at some point, will want to know the details about their ultra cool great-grandma Taylor's life, to include and not limited to, her wedding day! So youngins', feast your eyes on this genealogical gem!

Chapter 2

When Rob and I got engaged, we had originally planned for a September 2014 wedding. Remember how in Chapter 1, Giddy Engaged Girl, I had mentioned how I never brought up marriage lest I scare off my great catch? That girl was SO gone, and the jig was up! Now that I knew my great catch was all about this, that prior discretion was out the door! Being the excited and eager bride that I was, I suggested the idea of getting married earlier, like say...June! Rob said he would be good with it as long as we would be able to plan it in time. Planning it would be no issue, because I had a plan for the planning: Enter Jodie Burgess. 

Jodie was my coworker at GEICO at the time, and I knew that she had helped one of my coworkers throw a fabulous wedding at an affordable price. I didn't know too much about the details of Jodie's wedding planning prowess, but what I did know was that she was a marketing/advertising guru for GEICO, had prior sales experience, and was a working Mom who juggled all of this while maintaining organization and sanity. Jodie graciously agreed to help me plan my wedding for a VERY affordable price (think: less than what a day-of-ceremony-only wedding planner would charge), and got right on top of contacting various venues to check dates for us. 

We were originally thinking to have our wedding at a military instillation just because most were very budget friendly, and also were very beautiful. The Halekoa, which was our initial idea, only had lunch ceremonies available during June.  I believe the ceremony would've had to of been at 10, and we would've had to start the reception by 11am. I instantly thought about how long it would take a bride to get ready, and assumed I would have to be up at 5? 6? Um, GROSS. That venue got immediately nixed. Jodie suggested we try the marine corps base in Kaneohe. What a great idea! I grew up in Kahaluu, so having the backdrop of my Ko'olau mountains AND the ocean was a perfect merging of a gorgeous view with a personal flair. They had an opening for June 14, with the wedding to start at 4:30 and reception to go through 10pm.

When we went to look at the grounds, we loved the reception ballroom/stage, but did not like the options for wedding venues. One was right outside the ballroom, on the pool deck. The base contact confirmed that they couldn't "force" the pool to be closed, so there was a potential for kids splashing around or someone doing laps in the background of our ceremony and photos. NEGATIVE. NEXT! The next venue was on the grass with a pretty view between two large trees, however, it was literally like 20 feet from where the cars would be parked. Not much of an aisle to walk down, cars in the background/doors closing, etc and there were also bushes there so hello mosquitos and gnats. We told the contact we pretty much hated both spots but really loved the location and the ballroom. She said there was one other place but she would need to get permission to use it - it was a large lawn between two military higher ups homes (admirals? captains? something high up). IT WAS BEAUTIFUL - the lawn had an unobstructed view of the ocean, framed by the Koolau mountains. We were so lucky that the homeowners were so nice and allowed us to have the ceremony there.

Shot of my Practice walking down the aisle.
PC: Angela Petersons

Behold, our exquisite wedding backdrop in all its grandeur.
PC: Irianny Ibarra

 SO BLESSED!!
 PC: Glexi Garcia

The best thing about the Marine Corps Base is that we didn't have to pay ANYTHING for the venue; we merely put down a $200 deposit to secure the location. That $200 deposit went toward the price of food for our guests, and then we were just responsible for paying for the dinner (and of course lighting, DJ, etc but those were all separate vendors). We were so blessed that we had such an amazing venue at such a steal. 

Jodie was great in helping us stick to our budget, and relayed the information to our vendors. I also wasn't a bridezilla,  of course, so that helped. An example would be our centerpiece arrangements: while I had an idea of the type of flowers I wanted, I was also open to other options that were in season and again, within our budget. In the end, I would not have changed any aspect of our wedding - I was that happy with how it turned out. We were able to pay for our entire wedding and honeymoon upfront, and even ended in the black! Granted, Rob had been able to sock away a considerable amount of money while he was on deployment, but we also really worked hard at saving towards our wedding, and "living within our means."

The day before the wedding, we had a rehearsal dinner that ended at Kin Wah, one of our favorite Chinese restaurants in Kaneohe. That night, Rob and I stayed on the hotel on base (separate rooms of course!) which was another convenience because I got to sleep in as late as possible and didn't need to be rushed anywhere - people would be coming to me! The day was so crazy busy with photographers and makeup artists bustling in the room and around me, but it was so much fun. 

It was funny to me how everyone kept commenting on how chill I was, saying things like, "you are so ready!" and "I can't believe how calm you are." While I can understand the bustle and buzz excitement of getting married, I WAS calm because I had no doubt I was making the right decision, and that I was absolutely happy. There was nothing to be worried about! I was in good hands, and at the end of the day, even if there were kinks to be worked out, I was getting married, and that was the most important thing. 

At 4:15, they brought Rob over to take a few pictures before the ceremony. Of course, we kept with the tradition of not seeing one another until I was actually walking down the aisle (so I could stun Rob with my beauty and give him no choice but to weep tears of joy and gratitude, obviously...:P)  This was one of my favorite memories of the entire day:

It was such a special moment for us to be able to provide support to one another even though we weren't technically seeing each other. It was a comfort to reach around the door and feel Rob's hand, knowing that in just 15 minutes, we would be embarking on a great new adventure together. 

The ceremony was a blur - I remember walking down the aisle and feeling so happy and giddy that my wedding day had actually come! I'm actually grateful that I wasn't wearing my glasses (and I don't wear contacts) because it I saw people crying (especially Rob) I would've started crying and ruined my makeup! We were so blessed that our good friend Lukas Petersons was able to officiate over our wedding. He got his Hawaii marriage license so he could perform our wedding ceremony. At the end, the rain sprinkled down right when we were pronounced man and wife, which people SAY is good luck (although I suspect the "people" here are ones that say this to make themselves feel better because it rained on their wedding days!) In any event, we were SO HAPPY!!! Witness our happiness below:

BASK IN OUR HAPPINESS!
PC: Hoku Tefan

VICTORY!!!
PC: Roxy Kimokeo

The ceremony, again, went by so fast! All I know is I was starving, and it was so busy that we barely got to eat (though I tried to shovel some food down in between taking photos and participating in the program). I danced a hula (it was a surprise for Rob), which is a tradition for Hawaiian brides at weddings. The song I danced to was "E Maliu Mai," which I chose because the words were so beautiful and appropriate for a wedding. My friend Nathan Okinaka created and taught me the dance a week before the wedding! I had a fever that night and was really under the weather, but I practiced it enough to have Nathan record me dancing it, then went home, rested, and practiced the rest of the week. 

We had SO much fun during the reception! We had a dance and really awesome music that Rob and I had hand-selected for the most part! (and yes, it was heavy on the early 2000s music, as dictated by our clubbing days!) At about 8pm, my face hurt from smiling. At about 9, I told Rob we needed to get out of there before I started to look as tired (and grouchy!) as I was beginning to feel! It was a long day, but SO WORTH it. At the end of it all, we have amazing memories (and photos and video footage) to remind us of how happy we were to be married, and to remind us of the excitement and preciousness of that day. (It becomes especially useful to remember this special, wonderful day when we are annoyed with one another!)  I still find myself looking through our marriage photos frequently, and watching our wedding video periodically. This day, and the birth of Uriah, were the best days of my life.  

Memoirs of a Bride, Chapter 1: Giddy Engaged Girl

While my little angel snoozes, I decided I would write a blog that is post-dated but still very important - details of my engagement, wedding, and honeymoon (not TOO many details, of course.. :P!) I'm going to break it up into 3 separate entries because this is a blog, not a novel! On a side note, I was also able to make two loafs of banana bread and clean the kitchen while the baby slept! Let's keep this going, shall we? 

Chapter 1

Rob and I got engaged on Jan 1, 2014. He had just come off of a long deployment at sea (it had been extended from an original estimated turnaround of six months to near 9 months). It wasn't our first time apart, but it was definitely the longest (and I hope it stays that way!). Before Rob left, he sat me down to have a serious discussion about us. He asked me where I saw us in the future. I don't remember who brought up marriage first, but I'm thinking it was him, because I had always been cautious about bringing up the "M" word lest I scare off my great catch! In retrospect, I should've known that Rob had always made it a point to let me know that he took our relationship seriously. I had also heard many a horror story of girls shoving marriage talk too early down the throat of potential mates, only to turn them off and have them running for the hills.  When I finally conceded that yes, marriage was what I was thinking because "I wouldn't be in this relationship if marriage was not the ultimate goal," and that I hadn't wanted to pressure him, he responded that I put NO pressure on him. LOL. At least one of us was brave enough to bring it up! He made it very clear that when he came back, his intentions were to take us to the next level, and that I wouldn't be waiting in vain. This was the absolute perfect talk to have with me prior to deploying, because it was such a comfort for me. 

It is no secret that deployments are exhausting, arduous, and dangerous, not just for the physical aspects to the service member, but also to his relationship(s). I went into the deployment knowing that there would be times where communication was infrequent or impossible, and that phone and Skype dates would be even farther and fewer between. I know that it was because of this candid talk we had that I felt confident and reassured that during those lulls in communication, it was not because Rob was off finding himself a second and third girlfriend in Dubai or Italy, but because communications were actually dangerous or prohibited at the time. When I dropped Rob off at the airport, despite knowing he was leaving me for months, I felt renewed, refreshed, and determined to tackle this deployment and come out victorious. I heavily relied on keeping myself happily busy with working out, meal prepping, and spending time working or with family. (This was the period where I lost 45 pounds because my life literally was work, gym, meal prep, sleep, repeat) 

The long awaited sailor pick-up!

Soooo happy...and soooo skinny.

Fast forward to New Years Eve. Rob and I were at his apartment on Citron Street, and he told me to pick a place to eat. I said Sorabol (korean food). If I had known this was to be one of the most "romantic" points of my life, I would've picked someplace a little more romantic and a little less kimchee breath. BUT! I guess keeping the secret was important, and the secret was kept! I also found out that in that same day, Rob went down to Kahaluu TWICE to try to ask my dad permission to marry me (Isn't he so old school and sweet?!). The first time, Rob walked into the house and my Dad said "oh, I think Liv's in the back room" (ummm..it was 9am and I was definitely at work. lol) then proceeded to go outside and feed the dogs, leaving Rob in the living room confused, alone, and still nervous. He followed my dad outside and hinted that he wanted to talk to him about me. My Dad caught the drift and then told Rob to come back later when my Mom was home!!! So poor, agreeable Rob said ok, then went back to discuss it when my Mom was there. Of course, they were ecstatic for me and readily agreed! I digress....

After dinner, Rob asked if I wanted to go out to watch the fireworks or to watch them from the apartment window (his apartment was in Waikiki). My lazy self said that watching it from the apartment was fine. I assume he thought I would've said to go out and watch them, because he suggested that we go out and watch them from the Halekoa. In retrospect, Im so glad we did! Getting engaged at all is exciting regardless of where it happens, but if I could choose one, I would pick getting engaged on the beach in Waikiki vs. in an apartment on Citron next to our musty old grumpy neighbors.

We picked a spot on the sand along the water. Considering how crazy busy everywhere is for New Year's Eve, the Halekoa was surprisingly open, though there was still a pretty good amount of people there. When 12am rolled around, Rob kneeled up. I thought he was trying to get a better view, but he was getting on his knee to do the traditional proposal pose. I was sitting in front of him so I was oblivious to everything that was going on behind me. Rob brought his arm around me, ring in hand,  and said, "Would you be my wife?" My immediate and initial response was, "Are you serious????" SEGUE: I generally HATE my dorky initial reactions. I am so not smooth. When Rob first told me that he loved me, my initial response was, "Reallllly?" pretty much like Steve Urkel, in my opinion. Ugh. I still cringe. ANYWAY, after the "are you serious" I obviously said yes. The ring was GORGEOUS, and I LOVED how it sparkled on my finger. I couldn't have picked a more beautiful ring out myself. I later learned that Rob had emailed my best friend, Angela, while on deployment to get information on the type of ring that I might want. So ANGELA ALSO did a great job! The people around us who knew what had happened started clapping. So that was it! On a beach in Waikiki, with fireworks in the background, with the man I loved, I got engaged. It was such an exciting night for me, and one that always makes me smile when I think of it. It was and will always be one of the best decisions of my life!

Reasons Why I Love My Husband

This entry isn't really so much for the world to read as it is a nice accounting and reminder for me of some of the myriad reasons why I love my husband. These will particularly come in handy during times when he is being, well, less than lovable. Note to self: COME TO BLOG WHEN HUSBAND IS BEING LESS THAN LOVABLE. So here's a start:

-He is kind. He is soft-hearted and goes out of his way to help people, especially family.

-He loves spending time with family. Rob embraced my family from the time we were dating, and in return, everyone embraced him right back! Family is important to him, just as it is to me.

-He is a chivalrous gentleman. From the time we were dating, he has always opened and closed my car door, and continues to do so. He also opens store doors, restaurant doors...any doors, really. The man loves opening doors! Maybe it's not so much the opening doors part as it is being a gentleman and being raised well. He drops me off when there is no parking and he needs to park far (this is a gem where lazy people are concerned). He also always walks on the outside of the sidewalk (closest to cars), and I'm pretty sure if there was a huge puddle like they always portray in cartoons and old Hollywood films, he'd lay his jacket down or find some other creative way to keep me dry. 

-He is funny. He makes me laugh ALL the time. He uses this to his advantage, as he has made me laugh during times where I REALLY wanted to be mad at him. How dare you ruin my bratty snobbery with humor?! It's one of his saving graces - and when I think about it, his humor is a saving grace for me, too.

-He is spiritual. He may not go to church regularly, but he has a relationship with God, and that is so important to me. His convictions and morals are faith-based, and he supports me in my religious beliefs.

-He is SEXY! See: Dimples, biceps, smoldering eyes, etc. 

OK, OK. That's enough gawking, people. Move it along.

-He is a provider by nature. He enjoys taking care of his family and being the head of the household.

-He is a great dancer. I love that he has rhythm. Even if he didn't, I'd still love him, but at least now I have a legit dance partner!

-He's just plain COOL. From his style to his charisma to his love of sports and affinity for all things Michigan, people gravitate towards him and love being his friend. 

-He is thoughtful. He is great at giving gifts because he pays attention. More important than gifts are the thoughtful gestures he does. Two days ago, I was so tired from waking up to feed the baby, and I was very grouchy. He took the baby downstairs so that I could rest. I woke up at 12(!!!?!?!?!) completely disoriented to discover he had fed the baby (who was out cold sleeping peacefully), given the baby a bath, washed the dishes, sterilized the bottles, and hung and folded all of my laundry from the previous day. I posted this on a Mommy Facebook page I'm a part of, and it literally got 385 likes. Everyone and their mom appreciates a hubby like this. One girl even asked if he could start a school! (HA!)

-He is driven. When we met, he had the next 15 years of his life all planned out, including a double retirement. Planning and foresight are attractive! 

-He is assertive. He has no problem standing up for himself (or me) when necessary. This is an excellent trait for a Hawaii grown girl like me who was nurtured to avoid confrontation like the plague. It's that Detroit, baby!

-He embraces my culture. He definitely has his own cultural swag (are the young people still saying swag? I'm so old. At least I didn't say mojo.), but is so open to trying new food, listening to new music, and even surfing (he is an addict at this point). It makes me happy that he tries to understand and enjoy the things that I love and come from.

-He knows how to say, "I'm sorry." This is big. No one is ever right all the time, and it takes a humble person to admit when they are wrong. 

-He is super easy going. Keep the house cleanish, make anything for dinner, and he's a happy guy. 

-He is independent and knows how to clean a house and cook if he needs to. Granted, I try to  do what I can for the household since I'm staying home, but he doesn't hesitate to help where it's needed or take the initiative to get something done.

-He loves me the way I am. Through thick (and thicker these days!) and thin, good and bad, flaws and all, he accepts me as I am and sees potential in me.

-He is the father of my beautiful baby! Literally couldn't have had Uriah without him!

-He is an outstanding and hands-on Father. Feedings, diaper changes, late night/early morning cajoling, swaddling, rocking, singing, tummy time, this Daddy does it all. He is my partner in all senses of the word.

-He is mine. When we were dating, I couldn't believe that there was someone this amazing still out there. How did this happen?! I was waiting for the baggage and for the bombs to explode, and they never came. I do not take for granted the fact that I am blessed to share my life with this person. 

Obviously, I haven't even scratched the surface here, but these are a few of the things that immediately jumped out to me. I could be editing for weeks, and probably even years if I sat here long enough pondering it. 

He will be outwardly mortified by this entry. But inwardly, who doesn't like hearing how much someone loves them? :)